Summer holidays are concluding and one thing we be certain of. The end of many relationships. Why? Because this is a time where summer flings end. This is a time where people embark on new career, job and education changes. But you must be wondering why would a relationship have to end because of these changes? It doesn’t, but it’s because of the intolerable behaviour you have displayed. This was the only viable reason and sound explanation to dump your average friendly chump ass (in the pickup artist world.. it’s known as AFC). So today, I’m writing about how you can change yourself if you are on the chopping block or already chopped and devastated and sitting on the couch depressed and living in the past.
For those who already see a different taste in your relationship whether it is decreased sex, decreased communication, less enthusiasm when you are hanging together, you are communicated to as a normal friend. BEWARE! How did this happen? As we get accustomed to someone, we get comfortable and we start to show our true selves. We become lazy, we don’t make an effort anymore, or we become so attached, we become clingy. (even im cringing at that word as I typed it). The key to avoid this stigma is remind yourself what you did to get the girl or guy in the first place. Was it your humour and confidence? Was it the fact she thought you were a breath of fresh air because she didn’t have to report to you her EVERY move during the day? Because she actually missed you because you were so spontaneous? This is important to identify and I think one of the tricks is asking early… “why did you develop feelings for me”?. The answer to that is basically your selling point. STICK TO THAT TRAIT! Let’s make a real life example using products. You use product A paper towels because it’s thick and durable (yes it may be a sexual reference ;)), but product A quality decreased over time and it’s now thin and breaks after their 2 drops of water. You would say FUCK THIS! I’m going with product B. so summary of this paragraph is .. do not change your selling point.
To those folks who have been dumped. Crying under the stairs. Come out and stop being like that. The first question is always “How do I get them back”. This is a big topic, but I’ll summarize in a paragraph. You lost sight of yourself while you were in the relationship. You became too dependent on the relationship and you became who you THOUGHT the girl liked. You lack originality. You lack spontaneity. You lacked being a provider. You lacked the ability to satisfy her with being your original self. You most likely did everything she asked and was there for her 100% of the time…. So where did it all go wrong? You suffocated her. You lead her to feeling trapped. You made her feel she couldn’t match your love. So what should you do to avoid this? Live your life as is. Make her believe she is there as an embellishment to your life. And THAT YOU HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE OF HER. It is a very vicious world out there, if your girl or guy is an attractive person, chances are they will seek a lot of attention and people will knock on their door. Just because there is a goalie, it doesn’t mean they can’t score. What do you need to do to get them back? Well.. first off. FIND YOURSELF first. Find all your passions and be a person in control of your own life. Give the other person a good amount of time and space. If you really accidentally run into them, keep the conversation short and light hearted. Do NOT get emotional. I’d say give it 2 months then you can text them and see how they are doing. Grab a drink and work your new charms on her.
There’s also another type of girls or guys out there. This one is the hardest to read. The one that just date and goes with the flow. It’s almost as if you ask and you will receive an opportunity, but when it boils down to settling down. You will be cut out SO FAST, it’s almost they turned a total 180. These people however, are the most fun. But you need the right ingredients to master this rare breed. ONE trick is to make sure you can turn your emotions on and off. It is a hard skill. You need to be patient because as you take this type of human being out, you will also see a lot of others taking them out. You need to sell yourself with VALUE! Advertise your passions and skills like no tomorrow and display it as often as you can. For example, if you can salsa dance. Ask her if she has ever done it. If she hasn’t.. you teach her a new skill and she will love you for it. If you play a musical instrument, show her a few songs and teach her chop sticks and tease her a bit. The moral is.. with someone who is indecisive busy or just very playful with everyone. It is time to tighten those boxing gloves and hammer it home.
Lastly, people now reject people or breakup with someone because they are not their “type”. First off, let’s be real 1 in 3 couples stated that their spouse was not their “type”. Some like skinny, some like dad bods, some like fit booty, some like blonde hair blue eyes. Some like feet suckers.. I don’t know what people are into these days. Anyways, the point is that DO NOT buy into a girl saying you are not her type. Here’s a practical example. An actor is frown upon for a certain role, but people still like the movie and some are actually surprised at the job he/she did. Same goes for a relationship, who cares if you don’t meet the basic checklist they have. In a job scenario, you may get the job over another who has the skills and traits the company likes on paper. It is how you present yourself. It is how you carry your head on your shoulders.
Lastly, to everyone single. This, right now… my friend is harvest season. With so many people exiting their relationships, this is the best time to find that special someone and make them yours forever.
oh, please don’t do it online. meet them in person!
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