I get e-mails and direct messages a lot regarding “she likes me 100%, but it’s impossible to get her out”. So today, I’m going to address how Busy equates to “you’re a consolation prize always there”
The truth is, we all have 24 hours in a day. No one is stripped of a few hours. Everyone has and needs time to eat, sleep and take a shit. Fuck! I mean, some people will even squeeze in a coffee run, even if it means they will be 10-15 minutes late for work. Why do we do this? These are priorities. We will die if we don’t eat. We will get infections if we hold our shit in. We get coffee withdrawals if we don’t grab a coffee. I think we get the point. Now, if you can’t squeeze in a date within a month.. reality is you are really low on the priority of to do list (or high on the not to do list).
In present day, we have so much social mediums to meet and match with people, it has become a world of texting back and forth, and little actual in person interaction. It makes for a frustrating time for all singles. It has become a “I have an evening free and I want to see Guy A” so I’ll wait. Guy A is now also free on the same night, but he rather see Girl B. Girl B happens to be free, but her priorities are on Guy B.. and the train runs on. The day rolls around, we eat in solitude and say “Fuck! I should have eaten with the other guy”. Dating is a vicious circle.
Busy with work? Working a few part-time jobs to make ends meet with mortgage, gas and food? I get it. There is no crime to work hard to earn money to live the life you want. But here’s another things people need to consider. While you are living in the place you wanted and drive the car you want… sounds like it’s easy to find a girl/guy you want too right? The answer is negative. I’ve coached dating for over 5 years. Truth is, those are the people who will settle less in the love department, or simply wound up alone in their life because they had their sights so high and while achieving all the assets they want, they will ALWAYS sacrifice the love department.
I have worked on average 70 hours in all my jobs combined. But I will always have good company at least 3-4 times a week. Why? Because I believe it’s a part of sanity. Most importantly, I see the best outcomes as we trial and error things. What does it all mean here? I’m saying I will eat with a friend or date. It’s a necessity to eat, why not indulge in some company. If it turns out terrible, then cut them out. It’s no big deal. No one told u to have sex with everyone you go on a date, nor should you.
A good buddy of mine recently went out of his way to coordinate everything to plan a surprise trip with the girl of his dreams, and the response he got was that “she’s busy working late”. I get frustrated hearing that non-sense. People don’t make an effort nowadays, so for someone who actually tried for love of God, please go out with that man/woman. All he wanted was to make you happy and basically, he got spat on. Another example, a girl friend of mine drove 3 hours to see a guy she likes and surprised him with homemade materials, and he saw her for 15 minutes and rushed her out the door because he was busy with friends already. Friends he sees in his hometown every so often. I know you must think, why didn’t she ask if he was free for the day? She did, and he said he had the whole afternoon at home. And that equated to 15 minutes.
People need to grow a pair. People need to be honest, instead of steering people in the wrong directions. Don’t like them? Not a crime. I’ll take it. It’s frustrated that we join in the vicious circle of chasing. Special people don’t come often, and if that special someone commits serious efforts, I’d say take up on the offer, lose 500 bucks not working. Because love is like gambling, it can pay dividends or it can be a waste of time/money. But wouldn’t you think the odds are in your favour? As long as he’s not creepy. Respectful people are rare, just saying yes can make you feel a million bucks. The rest can be worked out in effective communication.
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